Have you ever lost something that was more precious to you than your own life ? Someone special who was meant to be yours forever but now isn't ? Have you lost someone you loved unconditionally and then realized over time that the love reciprocated was only conditional .
Believe me ,it hurts . Hurts like hell .
So , what does one do in a situation like this ? You're hurt and you are expected to smile as if nothing ever happened . We don't grieve over a love lost in this lifetime. Not the norm . Not the done thing .Why do we only grieve when somebody dies and is put to rest physically ? Isn't a love lost , memory forsaken as good as a part of you dying ? We go into mourning when somebody passes away but we can't mourn a death of a relationship . That does not equate death ,one would say .After all the heart bounces back and we only mourn because they can never come back . They can never come back . What's gone is gone .
Often I hear a person saying ' Oh I wish I had known, I wanted to tell him so many times that I loved him . There are regrets made , kind words said ,memories relived .
But does that really matter to that person who is now bereft of any emotions ,any feelings ? The fact is - No !
That loss is tremendous . All your dreams that have been attached to that particular loss just come crashing down . Fragments of that loss just blow away from your reach . Beyond the hope of ever finding them . Never let something you hold so dearly just slip away . I have learnt that . Be glad you got it in the first place . Never blame the other either .You had it and you let it go . Why blame anyone but yourself ? I have read this on a poster 'If you love someone set them free ,if they come back ,they are yours .If they don't they were never yours . '
I have this lifetime to see if this holds true .In the meanwhile,if anyone has experienced this in his lifetime ,do let me know because life becomes more hopeful .
when love is not reciprocated ...it hurts like hell...it does
ReplyDeletewell written ...
Love hurts and scars .
DeleteLove just hurts and it scars
ReplyDeleteWhat you are talking about is hurt that stays on even after the pain borne out of a breach of trust resides.
DeleteLove does not hurt-it is gentle and caring not to hurt the person it touches.
“If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were.”― Khalil Gibran. Gibran is the third best-selling poet of all time, behind Shakespeare and Lao-Tzu.
ReplyDeleteThe bare truth is that relationships break down for numerous reasons-incompatibilities, infidelity, selfishness, jealousy, insecurity, dominion to name a few. We mustn’t confuse the intense attachment out of pleasure during the honeymoon period with love; and it is often too late when we realize it and prefer to hang on to the relationship just because we do not want to upset the apple cart or are frightened of change and its consequences.
A relationship is a partnership between two people based on love, a mutual understanding, personal boundaries and above all space. You cannot get into a relationship as a means to an end-provision-lifestyle-comfort-security-love-comfort-unity in thought and action. A relationship grows out of the small things in life and bears rich fruit with a much bigger perspective in view-happiness-comfort-love-unity in thought and action-security-provision taken into account your partner can provide for you.
If often takes a lifetime to find a good person and if you do hold on to him for he is more precious than anything this world can ever offer you.
Sometime even if you get the person back you might never want him because a relationship grows and matures with time-it changes without changing so to speak. A relationship that looses out on the process of growth leading towards maturity is often incomplete and looses the trust factor that is forged out of being able to stand up for each other.
Very few men have the grace to admit their faults and make adjustments for the women they love. The line you have quoted has a fairy tale like magic but is quite far from reality because most humans in this time and age have lost their purity in thought, deed and action.